I lost control of Cale's athletic career when he started eighth grade. Note the word usage, "lost." Actually, I lost my vise-like, death-grip on his whole being about that time.
I didn't realize it at first, but at about 13 1/2, I guess he started to think as an human being, independent of his family and dear, old dad. I honestly didn't know what to make of him wanting to make some of his own decisions. But after about six months of wrestling (pun intended) with this, I finally figured it out. And I "gave" up control of some of the decisions in his life including his athletic decisions.
This didn't always work out great for him. Like not wrestling for the school in eighth grade because he was only going to wrestle "club." Middle school wrestling was beneath him, I guess. Well, since club began to focus on sixth grade and under that year because the other clubs in the area's middle school programs pretty much imploded, he didn't do that much wrestling that year. I guess that taught him! (Wait, is it possible that maybe he's smart enough to have gotten exactly what he wanted????) But all's well that ends well. Cale approached wrestling with a renewed enthusiasm in the ninth grade, and if not for a season ending knee injury, would have been a varsity high school wrestler this year as a sophomore. Probably a fairly successful one also. He is six months out now from his knee surgery and cleared to return to the mats. Wouldn't you know, he signed up for spring club the first day he got cleared. Worked out a plan to attend practices with some good friends. And targeted a May freestyle qualifier for his return to competition. All on his own.
So I guess it's working out for Cale. Except for that decision to give up football to concentrate on wrestling last year. Still not sure on that one, but who am I to say? I'm just the dad.
This year I preemptively "gave" up control of Conor's athletics before the start of eighth grade. Told him he was in charge of what he wanted to do, where he wanted to go. Of course I still give him hints, be he makes all the decisions. And he probably ended up doing everything I would have had him doing. He's got that competitiveness to him and he enjoys some of the big events he has the opportunity to compete in. Probably more for the limelight right now, than the actual competition, but that's who he is. And at the end of the season, he is done. Sick of wrestling, time to move on to baseball for him. He's at the point in life when a lot of kids start specializing. I've always been against that (it wasn't like that so much when we grew up, right), but I see the dynamics at work. But we'll see how it works out for him, I think he needs his different sports. He's that type of kid. But I know he also expects to be a varsity wrestler as a freshman, and a successful one to boot. That is going to require some effort on his part over the next eight months or so.
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